Shoplifting Spree

They're like Robin Hood, or something:

Misguided miscreants like the Occupy movement have long twisted the mythos of Robin Hood to that of a hero sticking it to the rich instead of its roots in opposition to excessive taxation. Now, according to a report from Business Insider’s Emily Stewart, shoplifting is increasingly being justified at Whole Foods by “middle-class and even seemingly wealthy” leftists because they identify themselves as the “comparatively poor” in their fantasy. “If a billionaire can steal from me, I can scrape a little off the top, too,” a man referred to as Lee expressed as he described his actions at the supermarket owned by founder and executive chairman Bezos’ Amazon. Call his actions “grand theft auto-ing,” Lee admitted to pocketing items, entering incorrect amounts at self-checkout, and manipulating the scale at the hot bar to cheat the system. Similarly, a man under the pseudonym Jesse, described as “a 30-something tech worker,” confessed to stealing bags of groceries from Whole Foods that included steaks. “I never felt bad for the corporation as a whole, because it was Amazon and, you know, it was Jeff Bezos. He just profits so much taking advantage of the little people, so if we as little people can bite back a little bit, and that’s me taking $100 maybe out of revenue for him, that’s a little bit of a middle finger.”

Be careful that finger doesn't get cut off...